By Abigail Trafford
Read Online or Download As Time Goes By: Boomerang Marriages, Serial Spouses, Throwback Couples, and Other Romantic Adventures in an Age of Longevity PDF
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Extra info for As Time Goes By: Boomerang Marriages, Serial Spouses, Throwback Couples, and Other Romantic Adventures in an Age of Longevity
A woman, 62, remembers that when she took a fellowship in Rome to study Italian and religion for six months, her grown son said to her: “Now, Mom. ” But if you are married, carving out independence vis-à-vis your spouse is more complicated. And it’s risky. Arnold Kessler* doesn’t understand what happened to his ordered world. At 60, he is on top: a successful real-estate developer in Houston with a dynamic wife, three healthy, intelligent children, a nice house on Memorial Drive. But he doesn’t know his wife anymore.
Together. To come so close to losing it and then get another chance. “Now, in a lot of ways, he’s younger. He has a wonderful sense of play,” she says. He loves being with his grandchildren. “He’s so mischievous. ” And he 0465002801-Trafford:Layout 1 30 11/18/08 9:39 AM Page 30 As Time Goes By credits her with saving his life. “When I got so depressed, I couldn’t have made it without Cheree. I don’t think I would be alive. She’s had to put up with enormous difficulty,” he says. Also crucial is the support of his circle of friends, the Southern Boys who have borne witness to his long life.
It’s a time to take special care of yourself; to give yourself some slack— to spoil yourself. You’ve put in many long decades of pleasing the employment gods. If the talons of depression clamp down on you, it’s an emergency for you and your family and it requires medical attention. As Mimi says, Be humble about needing help. ✦ Several years ago in Japan, doctors began noticing a new “contagious” illness—a stress disorder that graying husbands were giving to their long-suffering wives. Exiled from the workplace and a rigid corporate culture of command and control, these homebound martinets turned on their wives, barking orders, nitpicking every detail of dinner, demanding service.